2010
guess i should start shopping
been trying to post this since yesterday, but since eric is out of town until late this evening – i’ve been solo this weekend w/the baby… it’s gone pretty well considering it’s just like any other day – i just don’t get a break in the evenings which i do appreciate and miss incredibly… i love my little boy, but sometimes i just need a break from holding him, or changing his diaper, or trying to stop him crying… thankfully, he’s taking a nap right now so all is well in the weakland household (for now anyway)… 
the past week has been busy – deck went to both our offices for a visit… eric’s department threw us a baby shower last friday so it was cool seeing him walk around, showing him off (like any proud father should!)… this past friday, i took deck to my office so he could meet everyone – i am SO lucky to have my own office and used it not once, but twice, to nurse… there’s been a lot of construction going on so it was cool to see the progress, as well as catch-up on what’s been going on, have some lunch, and then head back before rush hour started… considering this was deck’s first trip on metro, he did awesome!
i went back to the doctor on tuesday to have deck’s weight checked again – he is up to 8.11 and right on par for gaining at an average rate (1/2 ounce a day)… he’s still on the low-end, but doing fine and all the concerns/questions that i raised were answered… this is basically the hardest stretch because he’s not just sleeping and eating anymore – he’s more awake, but not old enough to keep himself occupied… i’m finding that we have to hold him more in the evenings because just rocking or the using the pacifier doesn’t cut it right now, and everything i’ve read said there’s nothing wrong with comforting him… so that’s what i’ll keep doing…
yesterday, i ran up to my mom’s for a while – she hadn’t seen deck since thanksgiving so i was glad that she had some grandma time w/him… we were laughing at how deck was trying to find his thumb and trying to talk at the same time – so cute!
today has been rather boring though i FINALLY finished our wedding album and placed an order for 2 books (13 months late!)… i also managed to do laundry, wrap one of eric’s presents, take out the trash and recycling, and watch some football (steelers won and skins lost)… i spoke to eric as well and he is anxious to come home and i can’t wait to see him!
since eric is taking off tomorrow, i’d like to go to the mall and get deck’s photo taken with santa… i’m HOPING that going during the week will be better than a weekend so wish me luck!
happy sunday…
growing like a weed
so much for keeping this blog up-to-date… the past week has been a blur with the holiday and all, and now we believe deck is going thru a growth spurt so evenings are rougher than usual and i’m feeding him constantly (or so it seems)… he appears to be okay during the day but as soon as 6:00 comes – he’s a different baby… i hope it passes soon because it’s taking quite the toll on me emotionally and physically… 
thanksgiving was good – we went to my sister’s in western maryland and spent the day w/them, my brother, and my mom… deck was out of sorts for much of the day – he made the 3-hour drive w/out waking up but as soon as we got there, all hell broke loose and he was a mess for the rest of the day… i had to hold him while eating so i don’t remember much of the actual meal… on the following day, we headed to pittsburgh where he was a little better but still out of sorts – poor guy, so many new surroundings and people… we also had him sleep in this portable bed type thing and i didn’t like the fact that he was on the floor and not between us like at home… people kept saying that he won’t know where he is, but i did… unfortunately, the drive home from there is longer (4+ hours), we had to stop so i could do a diaper change and nurse… guess i’m not the only person who’s done that in the parking lot of a gas station… we came back saturday night to beat the sunday traffic and had the next day to just chill-out and relax…
this week has also been busy with doctor’s appointments – i had my 6-week OB checkup and he said everything looked good and that i can resume all pre-pregnancy activities (which have yet to happen because of the fussy baby)… i would LOVE to start exercising but can’t w/the way things are going right now – hopefully next week will be better… i can’t even think about starting WW again plus i heard there’s a new plan so i’ll have to do some research… i also went to the endocrinologist and was given the go-ahead to stop my daily lovenox shots – yay! so no more of those for me until we get pregnant again (if and when)… i also went to two different Targets to find a 3′ tree, 2 grocery stores, and a dollar store… poor deck, good thing he likes his car seat…
tomorrow, eric’s office is throwing us a baby shower so i’ll have to drive in to his office – hope i can deck and myself out of the door in time… i’ve been able to work around his eating schedule pretty well this week, but the way things are going right now – it’s anyone’s guess how it will go… not much i can do at this point besides give him the boob and be patient…
and ontop of all this – i’ve been trying to decorate for xmas and it’s not going well… i am so used to getting things out and getting everything done in a matter of a day or so, but the dining room has been a mess for days and i’m still only half done… i have to do things while deck’s sleeping and if i’m lucky, that’s about 2 hours during the day at this point… i keep wondering why i’m bothering this year, but damnit – it’s decks first xmas and i refuse to do things half-assed (it’s bad enough that we’re not getting a real tree)… i’ve tried using the sling too and he’s not liking it for some reason – maybe i’m doing it wrong but he seems really crammed in there…
sorry for all the debbie-downer stuff – its just been a rough few days… hope you had a nice holiday and here’s some pictures from our family visits… enjoy!
2010
can she do it?
well, today is finally here – i’m home alone with deck and so far, so good… i was a mess last night though and cried for a good 15-minutes – the thought of being here alone, after eric has been here for over a month, terrifies me… it’s not that i don’t think i can handle it – i’m just worried about the times that he cries and doesn’t stop, or when i need to pump and he’s crying, or when i’m exhausted and can’t rest because he’s still awake, or a million other things… eric has been such a HUGE help and i am SO thankful that he was able to take-off this long, but all good things must come to an end… as of right now – he’ll be home in about 5 hours…
update on deck’s weight: we went back last thursday for his 1-month check-up and although he’s gaining at a normal weight, he lost an ounce since the previous tuesday… so the doctor suggested beefing up the formula again to 2-ounces every other feeding and to continue to pump for 10-minutes… i was a bit upset and still am, but am trying to stay positive and know this is what has to be done in order for him to keep gaining and get stronger… eric has been very concerned about my productive and found this herb called fenugreek that’s supposed to help women increase their milk supply (it doesn’t work for everyone though)… i’ve only taken a few capsules so we’ll see if it works or not – worth a shot i suppose…
our weekend was good – my mom came over on saturday and we went to a church holiday craft thing and then ran to michaels so i could pick-up a few things… saturday night, some good friends of mine stopped by to finally meet deck and then we had quiche for dinner…
yesterday was our 1-year anniversary, hard to believe i know… my how time flies! i can’t believe that it’s only been a year, but then again – we’ve had an incredibly busy year between the baby, the house renovations, and going to france for our honeymoon… we had talked about maybe getting my mom to watch deck so we could go see a movie or have dinner, but we ended up staying home, watching football, and just enjoying the day together… it’s not like we can’t celebrate it another day, right? 
well, it’s almost time to feed again and then i’d like to take him for a walk since it’s pretty nice out… the only other thing i want to accomplish today is put up a small christmas tree in the nursery – we got out the decorations yesterday and now the garage is full of big, blue bins (8 to be exact)… not sure when or if we’ll get a tree – i’d really like too, but am not sure where we would put it since the LR has been rearranged and all the walls have furniture… quite the challenge!
happy monday…
2010
1-month
today marks deckard’s 1-month birthday – still hard to believe that he’s only been here that long… my days and nights blur together most of the time and i have no concept of what day it is, but i do know that the last 30 days or so have been the most trying, exhausting, emotional, wonderful, and utterly amazing time of my life… since things have been so busy, i’m not sure if i’ve actually had time to REALLY process becoming a mother… i mean i KNOW this is my role in life now and it’s something i’ve dreamed about since i can remember, but i’m not sure that it’s fully sunk-in… seems silly, but it’s true… perhaps when eric goes back to work next week and i’m home alone, with deck, i’ll really understand what all this means and where my life is going… i’ll write about my thoughts on the first month very soon…
since we didn’t have a doctor’s appt. or anywhere to go today, we were able to go back to sleep after his 7:00 feeding which was nice… i made oatmeal for breakfast and then did the usual feed/tv thing for a while, then did some laundry, and then decided to go for a walk around a nature center/garden not far from the house… we were blessed with gorgeous weather again so i wanted deck and i to take advantage of it and spent about an hour walking around and taking photos…
gotta run, baby’s crying… happy hump day!
2010
schedules
deckard is sleeping so i thought i’d take advantage of some free minutes and write a quick post… sunday was his 1-week birthday – it is going by so quickly and yet, some moments drag-on like early morning feedings… last night was the longest so far, between the feeding before bed and the first one of the morning – at 3.5 hours… i feel like a new person when i’m able to get over 5 hours of sleep and being it’s hard for me to nap during the day – i really look forward to evenings and start crashing around 9:00… any advice on sleeping during the day if you’re NOT a napper? i never have been…
we had our 2nd appointment w/the pediatrician on monday – his weight was down an ounce so she gave advice on how to do better feedings (15-20 minutes on both sides)… being that he’s producing more soiled diapers now – things could be evening-out, and hopefully by next tuesday his weight will be up… since she didn’t do the heel-prick test (his weight needs to be closer to his birth-weight), we opted to get flu shots instead… my arm is still sore! ouch!
today’s agenda: taking pictures of deckard so i can order his announcement, and painting a set of wooden letters that i bought for the nursery… that’s about it… not sure if we’ll get a walk in or not, since it’s raining, so it may be a lazy day inside (nothing new as of late)…
happy hump day…
2010
birth story
sorry that it’s taken me this long to post anything – it’s been a crazy week to say the least… i can’t believe that around this time last sunday, i was about to give birth to deckard – it seems like an eternity and yet, sometimes it still feels like yesterday… i’m trying to take everything in, as best i can, and enjoy all these precious moments because i know he will grow-up fast and all this newness will be just a memory…
now to the birth story… it pretty much started on saturday morning when i woke up – was feeling kinda crampy, but nothing bad and they weren’t consistent… i managed to get thru the rest of the day, did some last-minute stuff around the house, watched a movie with eric, and we went to bed around midnight… needless to say, i was pretty uncomfortable and was starving around 2:30 so i went to the kitchen and had myself a brown sugar and cinnamon poptart and glass of milk… i never went back to sleep because around 4:00, the cramps (which were really contractions, i just didn’t know it) started to become more regular… imagine having the worst cramps of your life, times 10, coming every 8-10 minutes, and hurt more than anything you’ve ever experienced! wow! around 5:00, i woke-up eric and told him that he better take a shower while i called the doctor… he told me since i lived so close to the hospital, it would be best to stay home until the pain was around a 10 and the contractions lasted for 1 minute… i struggled thru the next hour, then took a shower, and got things ready – we were out the door at 6:30…
we got to the hospital and i was admitted rather quickly since i was up to 4-5cm, and i told them rightaway that i wanted an epidural… i was taken to a birthing room and made as comfortable as possible, even though nothing would help at that point… i can remember barely being able to concentrate on anything and just trying to get thru each contraction by breathing… when the doctor got there around 10:00, and i was up to 7cm and soon the anathesilogist came and began the epidural (yay for drugs!)… it wasn’t the best experience and it was very hard to sit hunched over on the bed, while having contractions, and trying to relax so the guy could stick a needle in my spine… lets just say by the time meds started kicking-in, i was a much happier person…
by 3:00, i was up to 10cm so they decided it was time for me to start pushing… this continued for about 2.5 hours and though progress had been made, it was apparent that the baby’s head was just not going to fit thru my pelvis… the doc said i had 2 options – continue to push, even though it probably wouldn’t help, or have a cesarean… the baby wasn’t in any danger and neither was i, but his head was starting to get swollen from trying to squeeze thru an area that wasn’t made for him… i had a good cry on the hospital bed – i was so exhausted and disappointed that i wouldn’t get to experience the joy of “giving” birth in the normal sense… i tried for another 1/2 hour and after still no progress, i gave the go-ahead and they began prepping me for surgery…
the next 1/2 hour flew by very quickly and i remember being wheeled into the OR around 7:00 and deckard was born around 7:16… i couldn’t see anything or touch him, but eric was right there and was able to tell me that he was perfect… he cried and peed on the nurse (a good sign) and about 5 minutes later, they handed him to eric and i got to see my little, blonde-haired, blue-eyed, baby boy… perfect in every way and eyes wide-open… that had to be the most awesome moment of my life – nothing has or ever will come close…
the next few days in the hospital were trying, to say the least, i was in a great deal of pain and couldn’t move much so eric did most of the first diaper changes… by day 2, i was able to have solid foods again and take a shower, and they wanted me up and moving around which was incredibly hard… it was hard to sleep since i was being checked-on every 2 hours, and both deckard and i were learning the breastfeeding ropes, which has been it’s own struggle (but improves everyday)… the pediatrician gave him the thumbs-up on wednesday morning and my OB gave me the “all clear” as well (my white blood cell count had been pretty high the day before) so we were ready to go home…
today is the 4th full-day that we’ve been home – it has been the most trying, exhausting, and incredible experience having a baby… i still look at him when he’s sleeping and wonder how he ever fit in my belly, and laugh every time he has the hiccups because he had them while i was pregnant… i can’t stand it when he cries and want to hold him and comfort him – sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t… i haven’t been the best at sleeping when he sleeps, but know i need to work on that so i don’t run myself ragged…
eric has been incredible through everything – from the moment i said “i think i’m labor” to just now when i told him i found the binky that i had thought i’d lost and was in tears because i felt so stupid… he’s been up with me during feedings, a champ a diaper changing, wonderful at singing him to sleep, and just overall an incredible husband and father which i knew he always would be… my mom has also been an incredible help and was here friday and saturday doing things around the house and spending time w/her first grandson – she is beyond thrilled and to see her hold him just melts my heart…
tomorrow we go back to the pediatrician and then who knows what the week will bring… i’m excited, scared, and just nervous with anticipation, but i guess this is normal new parent stuff, huh? who would’ve thought that after 39 years – i can finally say that i’m a mom and that my ultimate dream has finally come true…
i love you, deckard james weakland, with everyone ounce of my heart and soul…
xo
http://weaklandfamily.smugmug.com/
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